: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
