careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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