It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Randomize
