omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
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