Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.