I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
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hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
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I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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