I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
My breasts were aching with rage.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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