my vag is so smooth its legendary
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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