He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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