We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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