Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
so much tequila, so little girl.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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