I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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