Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize