I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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