Got a toothbrush?
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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