I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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