Kareoke will never be a sober sport
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Randomize
