out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Randomize
