Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
