it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
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i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
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I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
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