Will you blow on my dice?
just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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