It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
your like the ambassador to my penis.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize