so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
nutella sex= disaster
her facebook's as public as her vagina
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
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