Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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