He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
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