Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
