You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize
