12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
the night ended with taco bell and tears
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
