Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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