Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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