i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
