is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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