So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
