Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
