I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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