omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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