Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
i now understand why vodka
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Randomize
