On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I am midnight drunk by noon
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
