I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize