Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Randomize
