Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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