sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Randomize
