My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
