Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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