Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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