How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
