Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
