Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize