yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
