i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I would ride that face into the sunset
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
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