It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
