I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
